The Cullens Armed with Instant Messaging
by HaruhixKyon
Summary: Written by me and my friend. The Cullens are introduced to instant messaging! And Emmett's a perv! Along with Jacob! And Bella can -gasps- flirt! And what's with the vampire squirrel! Read to find out! One Shot!


**AN: Okay, HIYAS! This is HaruhixKyon and her insane friend.**

**Insane Friend: I am not insane so haha but HaruhixKyon is no offense!**

**HaruhixKyon: -death glare of DOOOOOM- So...we're going to write a fanfiction. And its supposed to be funny. If its not to you, then you shall just spontainionsly burst into flames right at your computer.**

**Insane Friend-Or whatever your reading this on!**

**HaruhixKyon: Yeah! So enjoy! Or else! And laugh at the right parts! Or risk being on FIRE!! -chuckles- We like FIIIRRREEE!**

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight.**

_**The Cullens: Armed with IM!**_

**EmmetBear: I AM GOING TO TURN A SQUIRREL INTO A VAMPIRE SQUIRREL! AND HE WILL EAT YOU ALL!!**

**RoseWithThorns: God, your an idiot. What kinda person turns a SQUIRREL?! Did the mass of air you call your brain pop?!**

**EmmetBear: Rose! I thought you loved me!**

**RoseWithThorns: I do! After 9:00 PM!**

**EmmetBear: Don't I know it! -smirks-**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: Ew!! Nobody wanted to know that!! B4 u say it emmett bella named me!!**

**ClumsyKlutz: Its adorable 2, Eddiekins!**

**FashionableAnnoyance: Yes I like the name too 'eddiekins'**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: Geee thanks for the whole nickname bella**

**ClumsyKlutz: You know you love it!! -chuckles- -has just looked up the word 'pervert' in dictionary-**

**EmmettBear: Speaking of love.. Rose?**

**RoseWithThorns: Speaking of pervert! Emmett? Its not 9!**

**ClumsyKlutz: Did I just start a war?**

**EsmeLovesCookies: Don't worry about it, Bella. It's a compliment to Emmett...kinda...**

**EmmettBear: Aw come on Rose!!**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: Rose answer b4 he 'persuades' you nobody wants to hear that or if the camera is hooked up to SEE that!!**

**EsmeLovesCookies: -backs away slowly- No parant wants to hear these things...**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: Esme I have read your mind on some mornings when you seem all happy!It's not that clean!!**

**EmmettBear:Carlisle and Esme doing something naughty in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G!**

**First comes jumping off cliffs,then comes being turned painfully over the course of three days! Then comes your son reading your mind when your thinking naughty things!**

**ClumsyKlutz: -rolls eyes- You are a true composer, Emmett.**

**EsmeLovesCookies: SHUT UP OR YOUR GROUNDED EMMETT! AND I'LL TELL ROSE ABOUT THE-**

**EmmettBear: Okay, okay! I'm stopping!**

**RoseWithThorns: Damn you had plans I had 'plans'!! Wait what was yours!!**

**EmmettBear: Well, I was going to start with the-**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: please dont mention THE outfit!!**

**RoseWithThorns: OH that outfit perv!!**

**EmmettBear: AND PROUD OF IT!!**

**ClumsyKlutz: Of course u r a perv! I mean, u like Rose for God's sake! Its not like she has a 'great personality' or anything!**

**RoseWithThorns: Bella your eddiekins is going hunting soon and IM watching you so I am able to kill you!!**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: I would burn you Rosalie!!**

**EmmettBear: If you kill MY wife, then I'll take YOURS!!**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: You wouldnt!!**

**EmmettBear:She wouldnt just sit there like she does now she would fill in for Rose!!**

**and if you dont believe i would do that just ask alice!!**

**ClumsyKlutz: -squeaks- -backs into corner-**

**EmmettBear: youll have fun at least rose does!! oh and bella im running to the room that u r in ill be there in oh 5 seconds!**

**ClumsyKlutz: -drags computer into closet and locks door-**

**EsmeLovesCookies: Because locks are such great defenses against vampires...**

**EmmettBear: -goes to roses room instead- **

**EmmettBear:Logged Out**

**RoseWithThorns: fine see u in da morning!**

**RoseWithThorns: Logged Out**

**ClumsyKlutz: OMIGOD!! GET YOUR ADORABLE VAMPIRE BUTT OVER HERE EDDIEKINS!!**

**EsmeLovesCookies: -ish disturbed by those words-**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: Sorry have to go hunting rose will be at your house to drag you to our house in probably an hour Emmett and Jasper will be there to!**

**JasperC'monGetHappy: Erm...are you sure you want to leave Bells with US?! Rose: After that no personality comment. Emmett: After EVERYTHING. And me...I just laugh alot...at her...still, they are DEVIOUS laughs of DOOOOM.**

**GiantPuppy: What about LaPush and shut up leach your laughs arent doom filled**

**ClumsyKlutz: -ish totally oblivious- OKAY!! -cheerful smile-**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: No Bella hes taking you to his room!!**

**ClumsyKlutz: -looks confuzzled- Huh?**

**GiantPuppy: Now, why would I do that Edward? It's not like I'm a perv or anything...**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: Because while she was pressed to you in a sleepingbag with no room you told her to take your clothes off and i CAN read your mind!!**

**ClumsyKlutz: Jacob... -raises brows- What a naughty puppy mind.**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: Did u just flirt!!**

**DoctorFang: -gasps- Bella is actually capable of flirting!! -goes to record this in medical journal- It's a miracle!**

**FashionabeAnnoyance:Wow!!**

**ClumsyKlutz: Nice to know you have so much confidence in my ability to be a girl.**

**EmmettBear: That was nice!!**

**RoseWithThorns: Surprisingly it was!!**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner:-laughs-**

**ClumsyKlutz: Edward... -raises brows suggestively- -ish still human-**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner: No I will hurt you **

**ClumsyKlutz: I am prepared to unleash the power of the nurses outfit on you. And it's not exactly SCRUBS. -innocent smile-**

**StupidShinyVolvoOwner-Logs Off(goes hunting to get away from the evil demon)**

**Clumsy Klutz: Dang it, (logs off)**

**EveryoneElseInTheWholeEntireFreakOfTheVampireWorldFamily: (logs off)**


End file.
